When a new shop opens in Clover Falls, Jessica Reader is excited to purchase a nineteenth century family portrait. The more she learns about the painting and its subjects, the Palmers, the more her life spins out of control. Her eighteen-year-old son, Noah, tries to understand and halt his mother’s fall from grace. Will the painting also pull him into the spreading web of corruption?
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4.1 out of 5 dark stones (based on 68 reviews)
You are a good story teller. You have get me to like and hate this story at the same time. You give the chance to see something that if i was in same place of them, i will may be doing the same thing when i was at this age. I learn on me.
This story was an over bloated convoluted mess with far too many thinly developed characters I couldn’t keep them straight nor care about them. Who is doing what to whom I couldn’t tell anymore.
Damn now I kinda want a spin off of them going on that road trip and have fun.
I was wondering which story comes first chronolgically. Palmer legacy or haunting of Palmer mansion?
Palmer Mansion comes first.
You are welcome. I hope I get to enjoy her more in future adventures. Such a sexy funny ghost.
I really love Eloise character. I think she is one of your most colorful and interesting characters. She never ceases to amuse me. Great job with her Rawly.
Thanks for the feedback! I love her too! 🙂
You are welcome. I hope I get to enjoy her more in future adventures. Such a sexy funny ghost.
Hi Rawly. This is an excellent story as usual. I was wondering if there are any plans to illustrate this story at some point. I would to see it. Thanks for another great story.
Thank you for the feedback! Yes, I do have plans to illustrate it. I’ll probably make an announcement about that in the next couple months.
Really enjoyed this story, I think waiting until it was finished and being able to read straight through helped keep the multiple storylines fresh and not forget what was going on.
I think there is a bit of a plot hole towards the end. Why would the Erasers/Iconoclasts not utilize the secret stairwell windows to the other paintings as a backdoor ambush? Being able to pop out and attack your target with no warning no matter where they are would be a pretty powerful ability.
Thanks for the feedback! I’m glad it worked well in a straight readthrough. That’s a good question about the secret stairwell … I don’t remember if I had a reason for not using it, or if I just didn’t think of it 🙂 Fair point, though!
The latter chapters have some of the funniest scenes I have ever read in erotica lmao. The exaggeration and/or contract in some scenes is just top level!
The slow build kinda mad me drop off reading this one I don’t know if it becomes better after I dropped off. Not a comment on the quality of the prose but felt like too loose of a narrative pace for a very broad and nice idea. Might jump in again or listen to the audio version if that comes up to see if it pays off and some of the hints towards kinks or narrative lines aren’t my preferred for stories.
Hey Rawly what the plan for the next major story? Are you going to have another poll to let the readers vote on or are do you have a story premise in mind already?
Hello Holyx, I already have a story idea ready to go. The title is Le Belle Ile en Mere. It will lean heavily toward the horror/sci-fi genre. The first chapter should release on Friday.
Can you say what the pacing is gonna be like and how the main son is gonna be. That to me will help my expectations of the next story. I hope it’s not convulated like this one is.
The new story will be very different from Palmer Legacy in tone, theme, and scope. That’s all I’ll commit to right now 🙂
I get ya. I’ll give it a try at least.
So far in pacing the Le Belle Ile is kinda like a cross between Palmer Mansion and Palmer Legacy. Potential to out strip Mansion for my enjoyment.
Helluva good story. Really loved this one. I hope that is Noah’s baby in Ella’s tummy.
Thank you for the feedback! Based on the timing, it certainly seems like Noah’s.
First the NTR with Enchanted Specter. Now with this main story with Noah mother NTR .
Is rawlyrawls going the route of Korean NTR novels?
Please put a break to NTR.
Just wanted to say I’ve been really liking the story as of late. While at first I was frustrated by the slow development, I now appreciate it more because it helped develop a really good story later on. Another great one, imo, Rawls!
Thank you! I really appreciate the feedback. This story has attracted lots of complaints, but I went ahead with my plans for it anyway. I hope people will find it a satisfying read when it’s complete and they don’t have to wait a week between chapters. Almost to the finish line …
Ugh when is this story gonna end? I love your work and always anticipate Friday to read the current story but I just haven’t been into this story once Noah got with Jessica. I don’t want to come off as rude – again, I’m a huge fan and supporter of Rawls work. This is the first story I can’t get into. There’s WAY too many characters and it’s just one huge free-for-all and I really don’t like all the meta Rawls story references. Perhaps it’s just me. Every story can’t be for everyone. For the past two months I’ve been hoping it would end but no such luck yet, at least I don’t think bc I stopped reading. Sorry to be a bummer
To answer your question. It’s going to end pretty darn soon, 🙂
Think the latest stuff with Sam pretty much put the final nail in the coffin on this for me.
I can’t help but think that eventually she and Noah are going to reconnect, and it’s just going to feel like he got massively cucked if he takes her back after he womb has been “swimming” in some other dude’s jizz, “painting” or not. It’s like there was hardly even a passing thought of Noah before she not only gets overpowered by the stench but actively initiates further contact.
Again thank you for all the content, and usually I do love your stories, but this is going down as one that just wasn’t for me. I did try to see it through but it just feels too . . . distracted. Like no one really has any agency or decision-making power, and things just happen and no one has any real reaction to them. The story just moves along and people get swept along like powerless, empty bodies or something.
Funnily enough the fact that everyone is just being swept along is one of the parts that I like most about this story since it makes the chaos the paintings are creating feel really unnerving. Even the people trying to figure out the mystery really have no idea what’s going on and are themselves being pulled in different directions by the paintings.
Don’t get me wrong as I have enjoyed the vast majority of your stories but this one I have found a bit difficult to get into..
If I had to guess (and I am) I think that it might be because it felt like the story was jumping backwards and forth from one set of characters to another a bit to fast.
Anyway I do want to thank you for all hard work you put into your writing.
First, you’re my favorite erotica author, so all criticism should come with that grain of salt. Also this is my opinion and I don’t create anything so I can hardly judge someone else about art. I think the thing that bothers me with this story compared to your others is the lack of a connection that these characters feel like they have to each other. While the prose components (description, emotion) are getting better with each story imo, the stories that feel the most complete to me are the ones where you had the characters develop connections to each other (Enki or Wicked Tower, etc). With this, I feel individual chapters create bonds between characters and then you have them run off the next chapter and I go “oh, is that a thing still a thing?” The stuff with Noah and Katie, Sam & Patrick etc. feels gratifying but working against what came before. Also when it comes to the multiple conflicting parties in the story, I guess it adds an element of surprise or danger in the narrative, but the looming threat of pseudo-rape is a bit of a mood killer imo. Alternate pairings are great but when one has expressed strong sentiment for someone else or strong aversion to their partner it’s jarring to where my head has them and a big turn off. May just need to come back in a bit and read as a whole.
I appreciate the feedback! There are a lot of moving parts in this one. It’ll probably be finished in a month or so, maybe reading it then would be best.
Speaking as a fat guy, it would be nice to get a story where the fat guy isn’t a piece of shit.
This is a fair criticism and I thought about it when starting this story. Roy was one of the truly bad, bad guys in my stories. And Palmer Legacy characters are mostly doppelgangers. So, two chubby dudes as central villains … But I decided that it’s where the story wanted to go. Don’t worry, this won’t be a theme that continues on.
Rawls,
While reading the 27th chapter I could not stop imagining the events happening and the Music playing “Its beginning to look alot like christmas… ”
Wonderful chapter… I am really curious to find out what is going to happen.
I would love to see Noah fucking the whole city while saving them from the other paintings.
Thank you!
Thank you for the feedback!
Dude. The truth is that the text and development has been great. But if you’re going to make Sam go down with Eddie you’d be shitting everything and it would just be shit, you can’t afford that. Sam is just Noah’s, period, Eddie can’t put her hands on her, he can’t, I hope you don’t fuck her up like that.
I already have the plan for Samantha laid out. Stay tuned 🙂
Eddie conquering Sam isn’t necessarily a bad thing, in fact it would be almost objectively be good. Villains don’t always lose, heroes don’t always win. I’d be more disappointed if there weren’t any consequences for Sam’s actions than if there were. Plot armor is the worst thing that can be injected into a story.
Oh, and heroes don’t always stay the heroes.
Last chapter was great. I was hoping that Noah and Kathy were going to fuck, and it looks like the groundwork for that is being laid down. Really hoping for dp with one of the characters, maybe Sam or one of the mothers getting slammed out by Jimmy and Noah. The depravity just keeps getting better.
Just a small mistake in chapter 25…
‘“Thanks, Dad.” Nick led his mother upstairs ‘
should be
‘“Thanks, Dad.” Noah sled his mother upstairs’
Thanks, I had Enki on the brain. It’s fixed. The corrected version will release with the update on Friday.
Combining Lord Enki’s twisted imagination with long-legged, large-breasted MILFs who crave anal … it doesn’t get any better than that …!
honestly IMO, keep doing what you’re doing. You are my main source of erotica, and i could only dream of writing stuff like this. every one of your stories has something unique and amazing to it.
?
It took a while to get here but wow, so worth it. I honestly can’t stop re reading this chapter. It’s gold. She tried so hard not too lose herself and still be his mother. I hope you can find an illustrator soon, this story has some amazing scenes that would make for some mind-blowing images. Nice touch with the bed, I was not expecting that! 😀
Thanks! It’s not easy to illustrate the long novels, but it is on my radar.
Hey Rawls me again. So I came back to check on it cause I figured that some progression was being made and it was. It took way to long in my opinion. but still nice. Now once again some negatives. I will get this out of the way first. To me and for some i bet. This doesn’t feel earned narrative and audience wise. You barely did any teasing leading up to this. You spent a lot of time setting things up and story which is good but I want and need teasing in order for the pay off to feel great. Enkie you did a great job at doing that. Here not so much. The side stuff should feel like extra along with the teasing and it wasn’t. I don’t think the pacing for Noah and Jessica getting them to having sex for all these chapters was the best. I honestly feel that like something in the water you wasted to much time on them. For another story like this there needs to be a better balance between the side stories and main one. I’m not here for the side stuff I”m here for the two main characters.
I would also like to say that for the next story I really hope it’s faster pace cause I dont’ think I can take another slow burn story. i need something faster just for a change of pace and I feel some other’s feel the same way and I would also like a asshole son again. Another mothership wilderness would be nice. I don’t know just something quicker. Cause not gonna lie I think if you do another slow pace story I’m completely out. Especially if it’s done like this.
Now positives. Everything else. The characters are written so well. The dialogue it’s such a mass improvement over your other stories. Better then Enkie and it was great in that as well. Your characters have life to them and that’s a plus. The main story is great it’s interesting and you do a good job of keeping it interesting while not front loading us with it. You bring it up occasionally. Very well done. Also the side stuff is very well done and I love that you gave Jessica and Noah there own chapter that’s great.
So yeah that was another review on what i think so far. Some of you are probably tired of me but hey I like commenting on here. Cause it feels a lot safer then other sites. I still have really big problems on the pacing of the story and I do think it will be a good ending. But I still think you need some work on how to balance the main mom and son stuff with the side stuff. More teasing please. It would’ve made them having sex satisfying instead of me going. “Fucking finally” Anyways, that’s all have to say. Sorry for coming off like a jerk. I just like commenting and want to see you improve and actually want to enjoy your work more. See Ya Rawls.
Personally I see Palmer Legacy as the Avengers Endgame of the dark stone universe in a way. All the stories are coming together and there are multiple characters to follow. In Endgame, Tony or Steve were probably the main characters but they were not the only focus of the story. That’s probably why the lack of Jessica and Noah up until chapter 22 doesn’t really bother me, because we have been following other characters and the Readers aren’t the sole focus of Palmer Legacy. Noah also kind of cheated in speeding up his relationship with Jessica because Jimmy is giving him help since he’s lived through multiple versions of each day and knows what is best for Noah. I like when the stories interact like that. Based on some of the comments this story isn’t working for everyone but I think that changing the genre, pacing and overall layout between each story makes each one more unique and therefore a more interesting read.
The difference with Endgame is that all the characters all had enough time to do cool shit and had the same amount of action scenes. There is no character that doesn’t get a time to shine. Well except Hulk. So perhaps it is the same. But with Avengers you want all the heros to have the same amount of screen time or at least have enough time to do the cool action stuff. For Noah and Jessica there isn’t that much time and there isn’t good enough build up once we get it. I do think that sex scene is hot as fuck and Rawls keeps adding new ways to make sex scenes super hot and fresh. But it still doesn’t feel at least to me completely earned.
Chapter 21 was great. Noah and Jessica are close to going all the way, and the scene with Eddie and Mara was awesome. I wonder if Mara will bring more women to her painting to become bitches for Eddie.
Hmm, thinking Mr. El is (Jehovah?) El is Hebrew translation of Yahweh / Jehovah. Much I don’t like Eddie, I am waiting for elaa and Mara’s pregnancies. Noah will learn to enjoy the new increased size of his mighty rod. Now he needs to knock up his mom and Samantha.
Ella
My first fever feedback of sorts.
So im gonna first start this by saying, i like many forms of mom/son erotica, whether comics, manga or western games, so i love all your stuff, not just because you mainly put out momcest but because your overall theme of incest is what always draws me in, the way you combine burning lust and yearning love mixed with motherly/familial instinct is great combined with your erotic writing style. I loved The Wicked Tower, with Naevia, Cassia and Dellia being competent and lovingly fierce characters, even following Vell in to battle as armored maidens, and Palmer mansion with Julie and Penelope getting corrupted for Danny but still cares for him a great deal, Enkis puzzle has Kate as an amazing sister while the mom mostly remained as the grand price the main character works for till the finish line. So i quite love the caring women you write where they are consumed by lust and corruption but still has that nurturing and loving personality. This also means im quite indifferent to characters opposite of that, most of the mothers from Theres Something in the Water, where they pretty much become drugged out breathing cum dumps with not much purpose etc etc. So i may have skipped half the sex scenes in that novel, and only followed the main characters erotic moments.
Now for the Palmer Legacy novel
This one goes on quite a bit setting up different characters, so the starting parts isnt focused much on the main character pair (Jessica,Noah), that is quite fine in my view, since its quite simillar with Theres Somehing in the Water in pacing, multiple characters with their own families falling to corruption, only that the families here on Palmer Legacy has different paintings as sources of corruption instead of an alien ball, so you already gave an interesting setup that is possible without explaining why (this) painting has (that) effect, granted the reader finished reading you past novels/stories, which is the weakness of this kind of referencial setup. A weakness i also dont mind since most of us are already here for your novels. Maybe add a preface at the start pertaining the referenced novels? So unfamiliar readers can know or read that youv’e already done the stories depicted in the paintings?
Anyway we are on chapter 20 now and the paintings are showing their true colors, the plot is picking up and motives are shown and conflict is inevitable.
I mostly skipped Eddie’s and Paul’s scenes because they are quite antagonistic in this setting, and like i said before they also lack the fierce love and longing for their mother and vice versa, so im quite indifferent to them.
I like the story overall.
With Jessica, Noah and Samantha you have already shown their feelings for each other, how caring and protective Jessica is to her son, so i can only hope that sex and passion will ramp up in future chapters, hurdling the other paintings obstacles with the help of Eloise, Enkis puzzle has the most wholesome mom/son pair since it echoes the novel the painting is based on, they are also the most vulnerable one since they dont have much protection and lastly with Kathy, she’s a wild card i would think, she seeks to be the alpha bitch, so i can only imagine how you will play that out.
The antonistic paintings can only lose at the end, but the question is always at what cost. So i look forward to how you write all of that.
With that i can only say, most of your readers are a silent majority, i was one before this feedback, so whether or not the majority of feedback is a bit on negative side, a lot of us still loves your work, and mostly gives our opinion on the polls, well i can only speak for myself but considering you have thousands of patrons and mostly 100s of feedback under this one, the polls are an easier one to gauge and give opinions on. Thats it.
I love you work.
Take care Rawls
I really appreciate the detailed feedback. It’s hard for me to objectively judge a story when I mostly get negative criticism (which is okay, as long as it’s constructive I welcome all feedback). I’m enjoying writing this story, and that’s the most important part to me. I think that usually translates to enjoyable stories. I mostly agree with your analysis. There are few twists and turns coming up. Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts 🙂
The hottest scene ever was Noah growing inside Samantha.
I skimmed through the comments on this thread and thought it would be a good place to put some feedback, given the sheer volume of it that’s already here.
Personally I think Rawls’ best work is with The Wicked Tower, Enki’s Puzzle, and Something in the water (in no particular order). Something that all of those stories had was (1) clear main characters, (2) a clear forward thrust of the plot and story, and (3) offered new ideas compared to Rawls’ other works. (42XXL also is an underrated highlight for me, but it’s more a continuation of the ideas of the dark stone, and doesn’t necessarily meet the aforementioned criteria).
Here, this story feels like it lacks clear central main characters or plot thrust. Perhaps, worst of all, it doesn’t really feel like it brings something new outside of the aforementioned lack of central focus. There are lots of self-referential ideas and images throughout this story, to the extent that it’s necessary to have read all of Rawls’ main works in order to really follow what is happening. That’s not to say that being self-referential is bad in-and-of-itself. But just like with star wars references, I’m of the opinion that references to other works the artist has made should be subtle easter-eggs for longtime fans, rather than the center of stories.
I had a thought while reading this story – could there be a story surrounding the dark stones themselves? They have been present throughout Rawls’ works from the beginning. I understand that providing a story may shed light on something that’s meant to be a magical plot device, and that an explanation of sorts may ruin the mystique. But this idea, to me, feels like it could be a much more interesting and new way to connect these stories together in a cohesive way.
Anyways, those are some of my rambling thoughts. Overall I think that Rawls is a fantastic writer (evidenced by my willingness to pay for this content) and I hope my criticism is received constructively as it is intended.
I was one of the original people to be critical of this story, but I feel like I need to comment again here. Yes, all opinions are valid, but at some point I worry that we might be spoiled to the quality of Rawls’ work. Even her “lesser” works are better than most people’s best, and she works hard to bring originality and variation to her stories. Thanks for your work, Rawls.
So You seem to have two male templates for main characters. A. Stupid. Evil. Proactive. Has their own wants and desires. B. Kind. Courteous. Spineless. Directed by a strong willed woman. Only the commissioned stories seem to be the exception and one other that would be a spoiler to mention because its the twist at the end. I find it odd that your earlier work didn’t really have this. Will this trend continue/increase?
Wow, okay. Gonna have to disagree strongly with just about every part of this. I’m not sure what you mean by commissioned work, I worked on three commissioned short stories years ago. I don’t do commissions now. I don’t think Noah fits into your Manichean analysis of my work. But for argument sake, let’s say he does. You just have to look at my previous main novel to find a protagonist who was an asshole and also a good guy. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I hate to say this but I’m done with series for awhile. I’ll be back in a few weeks or when I hear that the main mom and son are actually having sex. I understand building things up but there has been no teasing or barely any from the mother and her son and it’s taking way to long. Just like something in the water I just am kinda here like come on get to it. All this other stuff is nice but feels like filler and a crutch and you are relying to heavily on them. I’m sorry Rawls this is the first time i’m doing this with your stories but I”m checking out. I’ll be back in a few weeks or when I hear something is actually happing between them. I really hope if you do another story like this you get to the mom and son stuff quicker and I mean sex. Have fewer sub plots or having get to the main point already. I know you have things set up already but for god sake this is too long without anything between the two of them. Just a hand job really. No blowjob or anything else. I thought this was gonna be a reversal and the mom was gonna do more teasing but that’s not the case. I feel I like some of the other stories you have in here and want to see more of that then the main one or your short stories that you have recently realized and looking forward to that more. I’m sorry for this I don’t like coming off negative but I have to say something. This is something I was loving before but I feel like you have completely dropped the ball on this. I just don’t want to get to the very end and have them have sex and it’s only for two chapters. That would lame and i feel that’s what you are gonna do and that will suck. And now the futa stuff is gone. You probably bring that back but for how long? I’m sorry I’m done I can’t read this anymore weekly. I’ll check it out in a few weeks or when this is done. Later Rawls. I”m sorry again. Fro what’s it worth I do think your writing has improved greatly and it’s really good hear but this is a erotica and I want to see more stuff with the mom and son. Alright I’m done now. Sorry again.
I don’t see what the real problem is here, while I do agree that the main mom, Jessica, should begin having full sex with Noah long before the end, its not like we’re being deprived of mother-son incest in this story. We have Eddie and his mom, Paul and his mom now, too. And it seems like we will also have Ronnie and his mom. This are more mothers and sons having sex than in any of Rawls’ previous stories and each of them have their own corruption. The main thrust of this story is about these worlds colliding and they are now doing that, and still including mother-son incest. It seems like your particular taste is about wanting to see ONLY ONE couple of a mother and son and just have the story stay solely focused on this. I’m glad that there are multiple angles here. I like more married women and girls. There are still plenty of short tales to pull from where there is only one couple and its a mother and son. Enki’s Puzzle had a very small cast, this has a very large cast. And I’m sure that Rawls will write another story that does focus mostly on the mother and son and they have sex earlier, just as sure that Noah and Jessica will be bumping uglies in the near future. We just have to be patient but I think there’s plenty to whet our appetite till then in this story.
I agree we are getting more but for me personally and maybe just me I’m here for the main characters as well and when I see just build after build up after build with no pay off it irks me. I love everything else. The story, characters the little quirks they have the detail to them all the sex is great but that only go so far with me when the main two aren’t doing anything with each other. Also those either side plots are way to short or sometimes for me at least too long. Now at the end my mind could be made up if everything works out but for now I’m tuned out. Also I know there gonna have sex but when. Is it gonna be close to the end and we only get two or three chapters like at the end of ennkie. The only difference is that nikkin and Kate were have but loads of sex and there was teasing in the beginning. We get none of those things here. I’m sorry, I’m glad you like but this is probably just a me thing but the main mom and son should be the focal point and we should get to it quicker. Your right the next one will probably give me what I want but I would like for all the stories to do that instead of some. Take care.
Again, I appreciate the feedback. When this story is finished, I will do a poll with a few questions about it to gauge how it worked for readers. I tried some different things here, and if they didn’t hit the way I wanted them too, I’m happy to adjust.
Just wanted to say I like how you managed your story to stay as true to vision., And start working on some aspects that supporters vocalize. Nice work.
While maybe not every aspect works as well as it should, I agree that although we haven’t got much of the main mom/son we have seen lots of other moms/sons to fill that void. Some of the scenes have been a bit too short, but that is bound to happen when juggling so many intersecting plots.
Better get used to it. Rawly has stated on her discord that the slow pace will be the norm now on her long novels going forward. I’m like you. I hate the slow pace and the lack of focus on the main characters. The side plots are okay, but I am not really interested in them. They feel like filler. I hope Rawly changes her mind about the pacing for future novels.
I don’t mind slow at all as long as there is teasing or build up in the sex with the two main characters. But I do agree with you on everything else. Though I do think a lot of stuff is written really well and the main story is interesting but man the main mom and son need to get with it. It’s annoying. I know it will but it’s taking to long.
I think its worse then you describe. The plot line talks about Noah protecting stopping fall. That didnt happen Noah watched did nothing, he knows she is defiled there is nothing save Thomas and her complete each other Eloise agreed. So fuck mom its to late we didnt even attempt to save. Noah is the shittiest protag son not once or even attempt to protect .mom.. cant now she belongs. To Thomas. Mo. Is disgusting whore and no son gonna fuck with her.
Not to complain but I’m gonna complain. Every one of the good scenes I come here for seem overly short and lacking….. Completion? Just this story.
i agree. There too short and take away for me the main story of what I acutally want to see. At first I was for it cause I thought there was gonna be a balance but now I see there isn’t and now it’s just more and more build up.
While I understand others’ misgivings about the pacing, I feel like I don’t have as much of a problem with it since I only started following the story relatively recently and was able to binge most of the buildup rather than having to wait for the weekly update from the beginning. Now things seem to really be ramping up so I have a feeling most readers’ issues with that will be addressed pretty soon.
As for Noah, I personally disagree that he seems overly weak or whiny. I think part of it is the switch up of the mother being corrupted first over the son, so naturally he’ll be the one to be hesitant/suspicious of everything going on. I actually like that this attitude (in conjunction with the wider situation) let him and Sam negotiate the terms of the deal a little. Also I believe his most egregious examples of meekness have been when he came under the influence of the other paintings, which made him more docile. So now that he has the Palmers’ protection we shouldn’t have to worry about that anymore. Also if you recall he was pretty assertive when they confronted Eddie after they made the deal and ushered them away (which, by the way, was supremely satisfying; I really don’t like Eddie, skim his sex scenes, and really reaaally hope the deal will be enough protection for Sam because I seriously don’t want to see that happen). So yeah, I look forward to seeing him become more confident and uh… embrace the deal more, as it were, but I don’t want to see him become a dick like Eddie, and in fact love it when the protag in these sorts of stories retain a certain level of decency/softness. I also really love Noah and Sam’s dynamic, and am sort of hoping for their relationship to evolve into more of an equal footing, partners-in-crime sort of deal like we got with Enki’s Puzzle (which is my fav story of Rawls so far, btw).
Anyways, I know that was a little long but I just wanted to offer a different perspective. Keep it up Rawls, loving your work so far. I’m sure it can be a lot to try balancing your own creative ideas with fan feedback, all on top of keeping up with multiple weekly updates, so I just want you to know I appreciate your hard work 🙂
Oh, I also forgot to add I really like the detail that Noah has panic attacks. I don’t think that makes him weak, nor do I think it comes off that way in the way it’s portrayed here; it just makes him more multifaceted, and also provides an opportunity for him to be cared for by other characters (mainly his mom) which I personally like.
Thank you for the feedback! It’s good to hear how the story is working for people, too.
I don’t shift my plans for a particular story based on reader feedback, I have the arcs mapped out already. But I may tweak future stories based on what is working or not working for people.
Hey Rawls I want to put my two cents here. I have to say this story at first for me was great I thought you were balancing things out very well and I still think that a lot of it is great. Honestly. But I do think for me at least you took way to long for Jessica and her son and I wish you did a more gradual seduction with her and her son. I wish she was tempting him more often and it feels like it wasn’t the case. 16 chapters in and we are barley getting this. I mean I like things to take there time but I’m here for the main mom and son not everything else. I do like everything else but I do feel you are relying to much on that to take the bulk of the sex scenes and not on the main characters. I don’t know perhaps now things will start to change and it will go faster now but I feel in the next story I want something more fast pace. I like slow pace but you had Enkie before this and that was already slow. I need a break and something faster. I don’t perhaps it’s me but it’s frustrating that it took this long to get here with them and only a handjob. I don’t know perhaps I’m the only that feels this way or perhaps I’m tired of slowburn but I wish you had gotten the main mom and son having sex way quicker. I don’t know how many chapters your going but I hope it’s a lot so we can have plenty of time with them. I do love the side stuff though but I also want the main characters to get there already. This is the same problem had in something in the water, you took way to long for Pat and his mom to do anything. The benfit I do feel is that the story is better and so are the characters. I still think you are doing a good job with balancing everything else but I do think next for me at least I would want to get to the point with the main mom and son faster or mom and daughter. Change of pace. You tease stuff here that still hasn’t happen. I understand building things up I do and I do like that. But I find frustrating that we are at ch 16 and we barely get this. I’ve gone long enough. I still like this and will continue to read but I do hope you read this and take it in consideration if not that’s ok. Your still doing good. I’m just telling you how I feel about the story right now and things I’m not liking. Take care Rawls.
It’s not just you, I agree with this as well. Things just haven’t been progressing as much as they should be with them imo. Still well written as always though.
Yeah pretty much this. I love most of the stories and I still like this one, but it’s going way too slow and if Eddie fucks Sam before the protag, think that’ll be it for me and I’ll just catch the next story.
You are not the only one, I also think the same. At first I was intrigued, but now I’m not crazy about it…
Thank you for the feedback. I’m trying some different things with this story. I’m sorry to hear it isn’t working for everyone.
I have a profound respect, and am a fan of your writing, so speaking as a fan…I absolutely hate Noah. He is the epitome of the weak, and whiny character that make my hackles go up whenever I read a story, book, or even see a movie with that type of character. But even after saying all of that I do hope this story ultimately builds him up to be a stud and not a hyperventilating dud that he is now. That’s it. I’m not complaining about your pacing the story, or anything else for that matter. Keep up the great work!
and turn that kid into a man….
Thanks for the feedback. Noah is on a character arc. 🙂
You’ve hooked me. I want to know what Mrs. Palmer has up her sleeve and how the kids are going to “fix” things. I’m looking forward to each update.
Great to hear!
Rawls….Rawls.. Are you doing what I think your doing with the mirror. Cause if you are…Oh man….I can’t wait. I hope that not a tease and I hope if it does happen it happens for a good while. I so hope your going in that direction cause I’ve been fucking waiting for something like this in your stories for a long fucking time. You had it in Wicked Tower but never had them do it with the mother. This time daughter and mother. Oh god Rawls. i hope you go through with cause this it what I’ve been wanting. I hope the sex stuff picks up soon especially with the main mother the one I’m talking about. I like a good tease but I feel that is taking abit. Especially since we just came off of Enkie’s puzzle. I would like for things to kinda pick up a little now. Also wouldn’t mind showing a bit more of the side stuff going on more as well. I think that is the main problem. Coming off of Enkie and doing another slowish burn it’s kinda like. Ok I want something now. But it could just be my impatience. Take care Rawls and thanks again for the futa stuff. Much appreciated it.
Didn’t we already get that earlier in this story with Lauren and Melanie? I guess you want the penis on the daughter this time? Not sure if either Jessica or Haley will have that permanent of a type of change.
I wanted on the main characters. Often it’s just side characters or in a short story. I’ve been wanting a main mom to get fucked by there daughter like that. Either solo or threesome. There was good opportunity in wicked tower for the mom to get fucked by a futa but it didn’t happen so that was pretty disappointing for me. So maybe it’s just me but I so want this for this story.
I tend to agree with the previous comments, I do not like eddie. He’s fat and creepy perv. like roy was. Maybe he should breed Ella and Mrs. Price and Noah can fuck and marry Sam then breed her and his mom too. Cause I am pretty sure the Ms. palmer is not going to let Erato have jessica. who has Enki’s puzzle painting?
I wanted on the main characters. Often it’s just side characters or in a short story. I’ve been wanting a main mom to get fucked by there daughter like that. Either solo or threesome. There was good opportunity in wicked tower for the mom to get fucked by a futa but it didn’t happen so that was pretty disappointing for me. So maybe it’s just me but I so want this for this story.
Pretty sure that’s the point, but, all’s well that ends well, and, perhaps you remember what happened to Roy?
Hey Rawly, in the fact sheet (Thanx BTW) you list The Wicked Tower twice and the two descriptions of the scene do not match at all.
Yes, there are multiple paintings for some of the stories.
Hey Rawly I know this is off topic, but is Redoxxa planning to do Mothership wilderness and the new story being voted on now at the same time? So essentially two illustrations a month?
With the new project, Redoxa will be working on two novels and short every month or so. That’s Something in the Water, Mothership, and the new story.
Hey Rawls. I wanted to put some of my two cents on here again. I feel right now you are doing a good job with setting things up. I was thinking you are taking a while again to get to the main event but then again you do that with a lot of your stories so it’s not really a surprise. I feel that you are doing a good job with making your character’s different with there quirks, personalities, looks and the way they talk. But I think you could do better with that. With a big cast like this you need to really make them stand out from each other. I do think a character chart of who is who would be fantastic and I would recommend doing this with every story with a large cast for know on. We are reading this once a week and sometimes we don’t have time to go back and reread what your wrote so that would help get us up to speed. Also I like what you are doing with Eloise. I like how she is the one corrupting the main mother. Forgive me I can’t remember her name. I love that stuff. Also what your doing with sister with the futa. If your gonna do in the future what I think your gonna do I’m so down for it. It’s been something I’ve been wanting for a long time. I’m down lol. But I feel what makes this better is that you don’t have a underlying plot underneath this. For example, something in the water you had the alien plot. You don’t have that here. You have something similar but you do not keep cutting back to that anymore. I’m glad keep that brief cause at this point we are not really interested in that we are interested in the other parts. I’m curious once we start rolling with the mom and son how that’s gonna be but I’m glad you have more lesbian stuff in this. I’m very happy. Something different and refreshing. I know a lot of people don’t like that. But keep going with this. I for one am glad for this. We need more diversity in your stories and this is nice. Also thanks for the futa stuff again. It’s been something I’ve been wanting you to do for your main stories.
Also I like the role reversals you have for the moms. You have the moms or mom being the Roy in the stitution and I love that. But you don’t use her too much. That is also good. Not having one thing overpower the main plot with the mom and son. You are doing good in this and there are some things you can still do better but you are still doing a great job. Take care Rawls. Looking forward to more.
Thanks for your feedback. You touch on a lot of unusual choices I made for this story. I went out on a limb with this one, I’m glad it’s working.
Holy moly! 12 chapters to the main event is that a new record? I’m glad you chose to contine the series, the interplay of themes helps elevate the story and keeps you guessing what’s showing up next 🙂
The scene between Kathy and her mom was off the charts, looking forward to Chapter 12.
Thanks for the feedback!
I find the idea of Eloise intervening to protect her own turn an intriguing turn of events. I also don’t care for the Eddie character, a man can be demanding without being totally self centered. D/s relationships cover the full spectrum, not everyone is into humiliation. Consenting surrender is a thousand times sweeter than coerced.
Quick suggestion: A relationship graph would be really helpful as well, especially when I don’t feel like starting from the beginning again
Yes, I can do that. I’ll have something posted before the next chapter.
Seems there’s an overlap of names for the families Kathy and Sam/Eddie.
In Ch. 5/6, Kathy’s mom’s name is Adeline Bly.
Sam/Eddie’s parents are Lindsey and Melvin.
In subsequent Chs. Kathy’s parents are now also named Lindsey and Melvin.
Great catch! This is what happens when I don’t look over my character sheet before starting a chapter. I’ll fix it and they’ll have their correct names in the new version when the next chapter comes out. Thank you!
69 likes, hell yea.
It seems that only the texture version contains chapter 9.
Hello! They’re both working. This sometimes happens if your browser has cached the old version.
Cleared the cache and got the update. Thx for the support.
Great!
Judging by the amount of replies and reactions to this story it’s certainly caught everyone’s attention.
And while not everyone has a positive response I appreciate no one’s been totally shitty about it (well done, everyone, keep it up).
It reminds me, again, how astonishing it is that Rawly manages to create so much variety within relatively bounded material. From a high enough view, all of the stories on this site could be lumped under “incest impregnation fantasies.” Which are not even in my top list of interests! And yet I’m happy to contribute my money and read EVERYTHING because Rawly writes across such a broad scope of situations and with a firm grasp of character and story telling mechanics that I find myself swept up and turned on.
Quite the magic trick, you glorious word wizard.
(I’m also quite glad Sam kneed Eddie in the ghoulies.)
Thank you so much for the wonderful feedback! It’s very inspiring to get such detailed praise. More stories on the way. 🙂
Also, I hate to say it but, I find Eddie and Samantha’s story grossly hot. Like I really don’t want Samantha to get fucked by her gross asshole brother, I hope Noah is the one who ends up impregnating her. But I would be lying if I didn’t say that the idea of pure, innocent, adorable Sam getting bred and used as a cumdump by her gross brother is also hot. The idea makes me really angry lol, but also kind of turned on. Eddie is the kind of character you don’t want to win, but is a bad guy u love to hate.
This was the common response to Roy, the character that Eddie borrows his powers from. We’ll have to see if Eddie follows the same path.
I really like Melanie and Lauren’s story line best so far. The image of Melanie’s blue hair tossing around and her blue toes curling as her pussy just gets dummy pummeled by her mom is 10/10. I think it would be really hot if you wrote a story all about a futa mom breeding her daughter(s). Or, maybe a futa teen girl breeding her mom and her sisters. Although, I find the idea of a mature futa mom breeding her innocent little daughter more intriguing than a young futa breeding her mom. You have quite a lot of mom’s getting bred by their children; I think it would be a hot new take for a whole story to flip the tables a little. Maybe even have a mom somehow breed her son???? Just some ideas, I trust you already have quite a lot of juicy, hot concepts waiting for us!
A futa only story is possible, we’ll have to see …
I was so excited about this story, but I haven’t been turned on in chapters. Has the plot advanced at all? It’s challenging to keep up with all of the characters and unless you’ve loved everything Rawls has ever written you’re guaranteed to read about something you’re not into practically every chapter. Looking forward to enjoying other Rawls stories in the future.
Yes, the plot has advanced, haha. I hear that this story isn’t for you. Thank you for the feedback.
I continue to be a big fan of yours and your work.
I appreciate your saying so, Craig23 🙂
I’ll double this. 5 different(mostly separate) sets of characters, all who are moving at different speeds in terms of plot and character progression, all going got a different kink tying back into Rawly’s signature plot hooks. It’s a lot in six chapters and kinda hard to focus on anyone
I’m really enjoying the build up in this story. The quip about Ben’s wife got me good lol
🙂 I appreciate the feedback.
Hell yeaaaaaaa, “Eloise Palmer is on the case.”- Fucking rights she is!
Well, it is in her purview. 🙂
Can’t see or download text or pdf that includes Chapter 6
I emailed you about this.
Good luck to the whoever takes up the illustration on this one 🙂
I’m not sure why but I really hope Eddie doesn’t get involved with Samantha, I hope it stays between him and his mother and that Samantha and Noah get together somehow. I like the hints that Samantha is being affected but I just hope it stays at that
Samantha is no wilting flower, we’ll just have to see if she can escape her brother …
I hope she’s able to escape, but maybe with a few extra curves from the effect of the painting in her house, would be nice to see Noah help her escape and have them both meet Mrs. Palmer to help them
wouldnt this make YOU Day Star?
The thought occurred to me too, haha
Pleased to see Erato getting a gig here as I felt that story ended way too soon. Just brilliant writing as per usual, it will be interesting to read how this universe continues to unfold.
I thought so too, about Erato. I’m glad Lauren and Melanie got to meet the high priestess ?
Sigh. I had such high hopes for this and it’s been rather disappointing. The story feels less like the Palmer Mansion and more like There is Something in the Water. And There is Something in the Water is one of your worst stories in my opinion.
Actually there is something in water is one of her best.
I feel it’s in the middle. There are some great stuff in it but a lot of low. Some boring scenes and characters that are not interesting. It’s a struggle to read and I have to skip stuff to get to some things that I like. But not the worst story.
Love the story! I’m really hoping/not looking forward to if the Roy-like character breaks out too much beyond his mother. I love rereading stories, but I’ve never gone back to that story because Roy was so infuriating.
I feel like for the sake of this story, something would likely happen between him and Samantha, but fingers crossed that it doesn’t.
The rest of the story is great, though! I just seem to have a deep hatred for Roy lol.
Eddie will have a different character arc than Roy. The paintings are gaining influence, but new paths will emerge.
Once again, out of the ballpark. Tight and well paced. New character development is great and well mirrored with the underlying original stories. Again, nice dance on the senses. The underlying investigation with it twists, turns, revelations and maybe consequences is the perfect glue to everything.
Really appreciate this feedback. You describe exactly what I’m going for 🙂
Wow really like this. Once again you do a great job with set up. I like your character’s in this one. I feel what you are doing better here then in Something in the water is focusing right now on the mom and son character’s and making the others side but still part of the main story. Plus I feel that the built up to when the mom becomes corrupt is gonna be great like in palmer mansion. Also YES FUTA hell yeah. Thank you for that. I’m glad you put in one of your main stories. I know it’s a side plot but hey I’m fine with that. Though I do hope that the main sister character does see it and ends up fucking the mom and a possibly threesome with her brother. But hey you do you. Thank you for that that was great. Also the main friend group is better and more diverse thank you for that as well. Overall great set up and I can’t wait for this to progress. Also clever way of bringing in previous works in this. Nice. Does explain which ones are canon and which one are multiverse if you could say lol. Good character’s, pacing, futa stuff is hot and will get hotter and finally a mom and daughter character. I know you did it before but like I said a main story. Nice. Thanks again Rawls for putting there and keep up the great work. I”m eagerly waiting the next one. Though you are killing me with how long this will take lol. But built up is better. See ya later and keep up the wonderful work.
Your analysis is spot on! I really wanted to have a wider character base, but not dilute the story (that has happened to my novels a few times, I think). This way we focus on the Readers, but also get to see what’s happening with other people, too. Appreciate the thoughtful feedback!
Took eight weeks off to tend to my spouse after her surgery and was thrilled to find this story has progressed in the time I was absent. Bravo, looking forward to Chapter 5 and beyond! Sadly I do not recognize all of the paintings mentioned, presumably because some of them are Illustrated Only. Would you consider releasing your older Illustrated stories in a companion text only format? I have a verbal mind and words draw the scenes for me far better than any illustration. Any time I see a movie based on a book I find it to be a disappointment. I believe the same is true of illustrated stories, the pictures in my mind are much more complete than what an artist can put on the page.
All the illustrated stories have their text released before the illustrated chapters. The basic membership has access to all my text stories. Don’t forget about Zapped! and Other Short Stories, lots of stories in there. You have all the clues available to the mystery of the paintings 🙂
Holy shit this is slow build. 4 chapters in and still waiting! Still love it if increasingly frustrated.
Ratcheting up the pressure … until … the dam … breaks!
Ooh I like that. Keep up the great work. Don’t listen to me or anyone else’s bitching. You’re the best.
Can’t wait for this to keep going
Enjoying this thoroughly for all the steamy reasons, but have to say I’m also thrilled at how it’s linking up the Rawly Connected Universe.
When I started reading your stuff I did not expect to get to the story that is essentially your “The Avengers” but a hearty congratulations for patiently weaving the threads together like this.
Thanks! I laughed very hard thinking about this being my Avengers.
“Corrupted ladies! Assemble!”
Futanari isn’t my thing. If its yours, power to you. But that means I’m out. I just wish it wasn’t so important to the Palmer Mansion/Dark Stone continuity. This is very well written on a technical level which I look forward to seeing in stories that are more my thing.
I totally understand. Just to clarify, the futa stuff is a small side plot and not the main plot in the story, similar to The Wicked Tower.
Why the hells there got to be a damn futanari? SMH ?♂️
Hahahahahaha
It’s something that many people like that I enjoy writing about.
I’m one of those many that enjoy it AND I can see it’s a side plot. I appreciate the inclusion but also that it’s not the focus.
You can’t please everyone, but I get that not everything has to be tailored to my exact tastes.
Definitely looking forward to this story’s progression!
I like it as a side story
An excellent beginning! I’m wondering of the totemic black dildo makes the bridge to a new generation?
BOOM! This is gonna be huge!!
I love the opening chapter, it gives awesome credit to THOPM and I love the other DS story eastereggs
Those eastereggs might hatch!
Hmm breeding under the influence of the paintings?
Hey Rawly can we get a illustration of how the main characters look like?
I don’t have any plans for any more illustrations for this novel until the story gets full illustrations.
Redoxa, Tendermind, Lexx and Satanicfruitcake are the MT Rushmore of illustrators. There just the best.
Hmm, mr. luci…fer ( I.e daystar) returns? And eloise already influencing Jessica and noah’s dreams, huh?
A return to the Palmer house. This is going to be epic. The Palmer house is one of your best stories yet. I am eagerly looking forward for this sequel.