La Belle Ile en Mere Ch. 1 to 10

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When a catastrophe strikes a remote, deep space hotel, the Zaal family survive with a handful of others. Some survivors harbor sinister secrets. Eighteen-year-old George Zaal, must find a way to keep his mother, father, and older sister safe. Malevolent forces roam the hotel’s empty corridors and abandoned rooms. One wrong move and doom awaits. George must be smart, brave, and resourceful to escape La Belle Ile en Mer.

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This Post Has 34 Comments

  1. Sluttybeignet

    Really liking this story(and really all your others ) its different. Love the hand thing. Keep up the good work! Cant wait for the next chapter! ❤

    1. Rawls

      I appreciate the positive feedback! 🙂

  2. Lobria

    Hey Rawls. I have to say I’m really liking this one. It’s well paced right now. The way you write your characters is great. Each one has there own personality so it’s easier to envision who they are and what they look like . I also love the journals you have here. Gives a wonderful vibe and tone to the story. Something new and raises tension and wow you killed someone. I didn’t see that coming. Wonderful turn and twist and I appreciate the fact that George gets a blowjob early plus it seems that the seduction of his mom is coming soon I love that. Also seems that the alien can’t recall her name. Seems to be up to something. At least I hope so. I hope this goes down like your old stories where the son becomes corrupt like in palmer mansion. I”m crossing my fingers for that and I’m coming into this with caution. Palmer Legacy let me down so I’m hoping this one delivers for me at least.

    So far so good looking forward to reading this every week. Also I wan’t apologize for last or two month’s ago. When I left that comment on Discord I didn’t mean it to sound rude. I was just putting in my two cents. I’ll do a better job of that. I just got to passionate and upset about the story. My bad for that. Keep up the good work on here Rawls. Like the story so far.

  3. Jimmy

    A “safehand”? Has someone been reading Stormlight Archives?

    1. Rawls

      Yes! I mentioned this on the Discord server the other week. The gloves are an homage to the Stormlight Archives. I love the series, and I’ve been wondering how a forbidden hand would work in erotica.

  4. anteater1

    I hope you never illustrate this story. There are some stories that need to be illustrated in the mind. In my humble opinion, this is one of those stories.

    1. Rawls

      It’s difficult to illustrate the long novels, but I would like to illustrate all of them some day.

  5. anteater1

    I like the slow build. You are becoming an excellent writer, with or without sex scenes. Like Ahabscribe your ability to paint a mural of complex characters is growing. What’s more is that I believe that Kapnos, in a way, is you….

    1. Rawls

      I appreciate the positive feedback 🙂

  6. Damned17

    When is part 10 illustrated of something in the water dropping?

    1. Rawls

      We’re working on it now. The next installment should release soon.

  7. Marty MG

    Loving the Kapnos doppelganger George and Lil interactions! I’ll bet he’d be more handy with a sword than the real thing which might give Albert a shock, come the dual! Can’t wait for more chapters! Bravo Rawls!

    1. Rawls

      Thanks for the feedback. Lots more on the way!

  8. youngstudent7

    A lot of good build and interesting culture touchstones of the gloves interested to see where it goes. Wonder what the original purpose of the AI and the object blocking the elevator. I wonder if this will go more Scifi or eldritch too. If the next couple chapters continue the build with some fun “climaxes” might be in my top 5 of your stories. Will it be picked up for illustration soon too?

    1. Rawls

      Thanks for all the feedback! It’s difficult to find illustrators for the long novels. It will probably be a while before this one is illustrated.

      1. anteater1

        I hope you never illustrate this story. There are some stories that need to be illustrated in the mind. In my humble opinion, this is one of those stories.

  9. Alldragon

    Is this version already corrected?

    1. Rawls

      Yes, this is the corrected version.

  10. JTass

    Need some more exposition/backstory… what’s the deal with the gloves and bare hands being a visual sexual stimulus?

    1. Osiris908

      Clearly you need to continue to read on and discover the answers to those mysteries as they unfold. Or, Rosebud.

    2. Rawls

      A woman’s bare hands are verboten by custom in their society. Like many taboo things, it has become sexualized.

    3. youngstudent7

      The gloves just seems to be something that has developed over time kind of like a regression from the free the nipples movement more recently. Kinda like how back in the Victorian era it was scandalous to see ankle or for some sets of Judaism where a woman can’t show her natural hair to anyone outside her husband/children or something.

  11. Mikey45

    I AM STARING INTO A BOTTOMLESS WELL

    1. youngstudent7

      it was fun to translate the French and Morse code. Wonder if the AI and Tim will form a link and he will start understanding the French like cybernetics and via that bioaugmentations

  12. irishluck400

    would you recommend using google translate for the french or are we not suppose to know what is being said?

    1. Rawls

      Sure, you can translate if you want to know. It’s not crucial to know what Oceane’s saying, but I do think it adds something.

      1. youngstudent7

        It really did add something. Plus gives Oceane the chance to be super sassy without the survivors noticing.

  13. luckydave

    What’s your process for employing proofreaders? Do you need any alternates? I co-edited a literary reading event for a year and I used to be an arts & culture reporter, so I have examples of my command for copy editing.

    1. Rawls

      I’m happy with the two proofreader system I have now. If one of them were to leave permanently, I’d hold a tryout for a replacement. This is what I did the last time I lost a proofreader a couple years ago. They are reliable, so I’m not looking for alternates right now. You sound like you have excellent credentials, if in the future I do lose a proofreader permanently, I hope you’d apply for the job 🙂

  14. RedSarah

    I love the world building. Looking forward to finding out why everyone is completely covered.

    1. Rawls

      Thanks! I’m very excited for the mysteries in this novel 🙂