When their town is sacked by orcs, a human mother and son rescue a mysterious scepter from a burning shrine. They must flee into the perilous Mottled Forest where they encounter all sorts of nefarious magical creatures. Everyone they meet harbors their own desires for the scepter.
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Illustrations for the first five chapters by Owusyr.
Illustrations for Chapter 6 and later by BSA: https://www.patreon.com/BSArt and https://twitter.com/BSAnsfw
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[rr-star-review]
I must say, I don’t like the fairies, witches, warlocks, ghosts, trolls and other magical creatures in these stories. I can relate to stories in which humans are fucking, but not half lizard, half bird characters.. I can put up with Pleistocene Ring because it is mostly humans. And the same for Mothership Wilderness. But ocus on getting the art work done for Marooned Christmas and the remaining chapters for Plesitocene Ring.
I honestly preferred the original artstyle in the first few chapters over the new artstyle, even though I enjoy BSA’s artwork in Marooned Christmas. I guess mainly because w/ BSA’s artstyle, they only seem willing to draw the male monster characters’ genitals. Whereas the old artist had no issue showing Marco’s. It really lessens the enjoyment of the sex scenes when every time Marco is intimate w/ one of the ladies, you never actually SEE anything. It’s like watching old-school softporn movies on Cinemax back in the 90s.
Also, I honestly must say that out of all the stories I’ve read in the Rawlyverse, this is easily the worst one for me. For one, I don’t really enjoy NTR stories, particularly of those involving a mother & son. But another reason is that Marco is easily the worst male protagonist that Rawly has written so far.
At the beginning of the story, when they were fleeing the village from the Orcs attack, he seemed competent, take charge, and somewhat capable. Yet it seems like the further he’s gotten from his & Helen’s home village, the more incompetent & incapable he’s become. So much so that in the past several chapters, he’s done nothing but clap cheeks w/ Lenore & the Dryad Pallida. In fact, he seems to prioritize that at times over protecting his own Mom & even keeping the scepter safe. Hell, his mother was kidnapped from right in front of him, and he still thought it ok to leave her in a tent alone, while no one stood guard during the night (even though he knew they were being stalked by a lizard creature). He can’t even do something as basic as carry her pack for her, something which the creature, Mister Hiss, does readily, as well as sharing her tent w/ her (albeit for sexual access to her).
And to top it all off, he professes to be an adult “cause I’s 18”, yet almost every reaction he gives to a situation seems like that of a little boy/kid. He has so little respect from his own Mom that she was willing to slap in the face & chastise him for “being rude” to a creature who essentially raped her into submission. It’s no wonder Helen prefers to keep Mister Hiss around & flaunts him in front of Marco. It would be really nice to see some ACTUAL development for his character, something that would gain his Mom’s attention increase his standing in her eyes. Because as of now, Mister Hiss is honestly coming across as being everything for Helen that Marco should’ve been, namely a protector & provider. And if Rawly has any plans on bringing Marco & Helen together, I honestly don’t see how Rawly does so narratively w/out making Marco a more capable character. Just my thoughts.
I don’t think Rawls plans on having Marco and Helen doing the deed.
Yeah, Rawls confessed that in a comment/reply under another similar story, The Warlock’s Claws, saying that there would be no mom/son action in either story. That being said, I can always hope that changes, but for now, I’ve pretty much given up on following either story. Especially if Marco keeps being an incompetent idiot in this one.
I’m not sure how useful this will be considering it seems like most people commenting are focused more on the art, but I wish this story would diverge a bit more from warlock of claws. I just feel like they are so similar and I have to remind myself when updates come out of the differences between them so I can keep up with the stories. I prefer warlock as an overall story and think the character dynamics are more interesting in that one and then I prefer BSA’s art in marooned Christmas. That’s all to say I don’t really hate this story or anything, it’s just a bit more of a drag compared to the other stuff
Thanks for the comments. A certain subset of people seem to be really enjoying these two very similar stories. I plan to keep them on the same trajectory.
Those sex scenes with Mr.hiss were really really hot. Bsa did an amazing job. Helen’s pleasure filled expression, Helen’s hot milf physique, the way Mr hiss’s love juices covered Helen hot physique( thank you for hearing my previous suggestion about substantially increasing love juices in sex scenes). Everything was perfect. The only thing I would ask if he could show character visually sweating while having sex, it would make sex scenes far hotter. Also thank you bsa, for your hard work, also the amazing work you have been doing on this story. This story is one of my favorite from rawls. Thank you for picking it, after it went to hiatus and illustrating in your amazing art style. It took time but your art style has grown me from past 5-6 chapters. And in last couple of chapters, you really hit it out the park, imo. Looking forward for future chapters.
To be honest, the art has really gone downhill with BSA. Helen used to be one of the sexiest characters I’ve come across, with chapters 1 – 5 being some of the best illustrations I’ve seen and what actually led to me finding this site and subscribing, as I came across some of those illustrations on another site.
The story is still great as well, but the illustrations now turn me off. Helen’s face and body in chapter 9 specifically weren’t appealing at all, and I really hope this is something that the artist will improve upon.
I appreciate the feedback. We are still trying to refine BSA’s style with this story.
I disagree I feel this works really well better than his usual art work. Maybe I’m in the minority.
Wasn’t a fan of art style at first. But is has started to grow on me. Kudos to the artist. Now the, Only critic I have is, more amount of semen drawn in more clear cut manner. That would make sex scenes more hot and impactful. Like the narrative will mention a lot of semen but you will hardly see it in the scene. If this gets fixed, it will be perfect.
I’m glad it’s working. Thanks for the feedback!
To be more specific, I like how semen is portrayed in illustrations of Nosferatu Next Door illustrated by MRPENGUI, it also matches how you describe it in your texts, if bsa can do that in future chapters it would be awesome.
Well since no one will saying anything about the changes I will. I think it’s because for some reason I didn’t get a notification for this story like it didn’t show up in my timeline or possibly I forgot or just that this chapter plot stuff happens and it’s whatever. But as for the art I do think this is a big improvement or the last one and overall his entire work. The faces are way more clear. I can actually see them I feel and the bodies look a lot better. There still some weirdness going on with them but I guess that’s his style but everything looks alot better. Hopefully he can keep it up and keep improving and perhaps it’s a me thing I would love it if he incorporated this style for his future work.
Chapter 6
There are somethings that are a bit confusing to me. Is Marco 18 or 20? Was Pallida really jealous or was Marco misinterpreting her reaction?
BSA and I appreciate all the comments. We’re going to work on an adjustment for the next chapter.
One other thing. I really love the ending panel to this I thought that was incredibly hot. But I do think it does need a bit more of a touch up or better yet perhaps not continue off were the other person did and start over I feel that would be better though everyone voted not to. Though once again I don’t think it was that bad just need some adjustments. That goes for all of his works. If he does that then I wouldn’t mind if he need a main story for you.
I hate to pile on but I also agree with the others as far as the art style. it worked well for CR because of the ethereal out of this world narrative that is based in what could be the real world. But this is already clearly fantasy and having more detail and less to the imagination or interpretation would be better. I’m no artist and I would never tell an artist how to do their work, however if BSA would be willing to mimic Owusyr’s style a bit more then I think it would go a lot father in meeting people’s expectations
Hey Rawls I will say at times I do think the art looks off. I say in the beginning when they are just standing there. I feel there needs to be a bit more detail. However, I think there are only those scenes I think everything looked pretty good. I feel the style actually kinda works with this since it is fantasy. Also it seems he learned his lesson from his last works and made the women more attractive and not old and didn’t go to much detail in the I will sageyness that was in the mother book club story. I think he needs to stick with having the women look like this and less like that because that too me is off putting and doesn’t work. Just a little more detail so we can see a bit more and the beginning scenes but other then that if he works on this more I’m cool with it.
Thank you, I appreciate the detailed feedback!
The story is great but the art isn’t good for the content. It’s really offputting tbh
Can you give some specific examples about what is off putting? We’re always looking for constructive criticism to improve.
unfortunately, i gotta agree. i don’t HATE BSA, but the style is unique and isn’t really doing it for me with this story. the style is kind of a cross between expressionism, and avant-garde…it is a touch off-putting. it clashes with the narrative imagery…. at least in my opinion….which is entirely subjective.
I appreciate the detailed feedback.
The artists work is thought provoking beautiful art you’d see at a gallery in Soho. but for this type of comic arousal is the name of the game and as crazy as it seems he’s overqualified lol
Yeah, i’ll agree with this too. The style is rather vague, and has an almost ethereal, dream-like quality to it…”nebulous” may also be an appropriate descriptor. Yes, i think “dream-like” is a good way to describe it, simply. From the coloring, to the indistinct way things are shaped and defined.. it’s simply too “artsy” for this medium. For your stories, i think artists who are more straight-forward (Lexx, TenderMindd, SatanicFruitCake, EsotericBunny, Sezlov, etc) do a better job of bringing the words on the page to life. The original artist for this project was a perfect fit…it’s too bad you two didn’t get along.
Thank you for the detailed feedback!
I always liked this one but I’m not gonna lie, I was looking forward to the next chapter but I’m a bit let down with the new artist. The old artist really fit the style of the book well. Are you not able to get them back?
Sorry you don’t like BSA’s take on this story. Hopefully it will grow on you. Do you have any specific feedback on the illustrations? The original artist and I didn’t work well together. So, he’s not coming back.
Any idea when you might be able to restart this story?
BSA will be working on it pretty soon.
I was rereading this story again and was struck with a notion.
Spoilers:
The music played by Helen during her duet with Gylfi wasn’t her induced love for Gylfi; but, was her love and passion for her son Marco. Upon hearing that music, Pallida was compelled by that passion to make love to Marco specifically. I had assumed that she was affected with general horniness. This notion opens up many more possibilities for storylines.
I like the way you think!
Artist aside, this storyline has several intriguing possibilities.
I just reread my comment and realized that it could be misunderstood.
What I was trying to say was: even though the illustrations are great; I find the storyline compelling and want more of it.
Sorry if my earlier comment sounded like I was dissing the artist.
No worries, I knew what you meant. We’re getting closer to starting this story again, but it may be several months.
Any updates ?
No updates. This one is going to be tough to find the right fit. It may take a while.
Enjoying the story. Feel the initial scene with the fawns was a bit short. Wouldn’t be a opposed to a reflective flashback that provides a bit more detail.
I love this story so much but chapter 5 is a disappointment. Feels like the story only progressed about an inch. The action scene was really cool and well illustrated. On the other hand the depiction of young Helen is bad. Her breasts would be a lot bigger by her 20’s if she is to become elder Helen. Only one child and her breasts grew, what like 3, 4 cup sizes? Doesn’t make any sense. Otherwise, I love everything else. I’m crazy about medieval fantasy so this one hits a sweet spot. Dryads… (drool)
Chapter 5 was definitely interesting. The question I find is…WHAT is Helen’s younger self? An illusion maybe?
I love chapter 4; I love how Marco found a lover that is more caring this time. The last part is the best.
Art is fantastic. Story great, wish it wasn’t a short lol. But still great. I really hope this person gets a full story. Also great to read this and this went in different directions then I first thought. Good job.
More please!! Wonderful work, both artwork and writing. Would love to see more illustrations! but I understand they are quality pieces and your writing certainly makes up for it in this one, so either way bravo!
We’re working on the next chapter right now. 🙂
Can’t open chapter 3
Try a different PDF reader on your phone. It should work that way.
I cannot seem to open chapter 3.
Thanks! I love chapter 3. It looks like Marco FINALLY got some action at last!
very detailed art and pretty too, not much of a fan of the mom NTR but the art is supreme, hope to see more of the artist
I agree. Love the art but the mother being willing to screw anything with a dick ruined the story for me.
I try different things in different stories. They don’t always work for everyone. I appreciate the feedback.
I agree, though I also understand that I’m not going to be a fan of every story. I had never read it before despite being a member for a long time, at least I can’t remember reading it, but I finally decided to check it out as I was updating my folders of other stories. The NTR immediately threw me off, and so I instantly skipped ahead to see if they ever get together and I was sad to see they didn’t. I’m obviously a fan of netori as almost all of the stories involve it, but not netorare/netorase (all are annoyingly abbreviated as NTR) which I am glad we don’t see too often in most of the stories here. I know they weren’t technically a couple so neither one of those fits by definition, but it does considering the basis of most of the stories on here.
***
However, the art here is *amazing* and for most of the chapters it’s some of the best I’ve seen on this site. So I’m glad for those who do enjoy it!
That Dryad is a sexy little fern. Here’s to a growing family tree.
😉
I am loving this 1, it looks like Helen is really losing herself to the pleasure.
This is probably my favorite current artist that is working with you.
I can’t wait until Marco makes his mother sing a duet with him. ?
He’ll need to focus if he’s going to rescue her!
Love this illustrator fast becoming my new fav!
Nice story, although after almost 2 months of waiting I expected more erotic illustrations for it, there was a little more in the first chapter. Having said that, I will be looking forward to the next chapter if or when it is to come out.
This is great when will the next chapter come out?
Probably within a month. 🙂
The first chapter is great, I would not change a thing. I love Helen and her picture.
Looking forward to the next illustrated chapter. Good Start!
Would love a series, even if you can only post the text story in advance
You’re in luck! I’ll be writing the next chapter in a week or two. The text always releases before the illustrated version.